finding familiar

sunshine eases the bite of the cold, crisp air when you first step into it. that moment when you bargain with the temperatures and the threads on your body to see if it's going to be enough, or perhaps too much. modify if needed, but in most cases you simply get on with it. 

those first few movements of the warm-up, that physical check in. the internal dialogue as you move through it, measuring the consequences of the previous days effort. the ghost of past injuries now filled with healthy motivation and willing muscle, bone and tissue. the loose stretch and activation. those first few steps and the beep of the watch as we move off. these routes are familiar but no day is the same. the dogs that always run out to bark at you, the same sign you've watched fade from weather over time, or a fallen tree you've watched slowly get reclaimed by the earth. the feeling of transition off the pavement onto those first few steps of familiar dirt that changes with weather and traffic. crunchy patches frozen from a recent snow hiding in the shade of old trees that have watched me pass thousands of times. animal tracks mingled with my older tracks. hitch up the effort now and start to find the flow. the watch is covered by sleeves and not needed, the central governor and a present mind sets the pace for the day. familiar landmarks, seen new as the sun sits in a different place. turns come and pace quickens with the terrain. owl on a branch, watching, hoping i'll flush out a snack. feeling the chill when i dip out of the sun's view. warm at the core, mucus from a lingering cold finding it's way out. 

some days, these runs are surprising in how good they feel and familiar terrain raises my confidence. some days they are dizzy with low calorie or high fatigue and I lean on the familiar to know what's coming due with the remaining terra underfoot. 

how many miles, hours, days do I have on these trails and the efficient competency it allows? measuring, knowing how much time we have left on this present deposit we are putting into the bank. is it mileage or something more spiritual? moving off the dirt and choosing a gravel shoulder or paved road, or throttling down when I see my truck posted up, awaiting my return. that press of the watch that signals finality. 

that feeling of sitting down, warm and damp from the run. pulling off those gloves and loosening those laces. face flushed from the change of temps. the familiar satisfaction of the discipline and motivation.

je ne regrette nien