Monday, October 29, 2012


“you must try to forget all you have learned,” said the old man. “you must begin to dream. from this time on you must shut your ears to the roaring of the voices. -sherwood anderson

 it's been cool to be distracted by two wheeled mistress these past few couple of months. i certainly have been in no hurry to get back to training regularly and i physically had a tendon was that ensuring i kept the promises i made to myself earlier in the year when i said i was done after wasatch. there is no doubting the high that comes from seeing something like a 100 mile run through, but the carnage that is in place afterwards is something we rarely see folks romanticizing about on blogs because there is something very "matter of fact" about it for some of us.

the experience is kind of physically and emotionally...shattering. especially when we are successful because it shows us how good it all can be. but, physiologically, we cash in some serious chips when we go to a place like that and the hangover that is in place for a couple of weeks afterwards is nothing to ignore. i have gotten wiser at training for these things, but recovery is still something i haven't dialed in. the emotional crash that comes from this physiological let down is the worst part of it. i go from having an intention on a daily basis for months leading into this to suddenly waking up with nothing to do and knowing it's cool, but it feels weird. i go through the motions on my daily task and try to find mundane shit to fill the space where my time outside was being spent. i didn't leave anything undone going into this...there is no stack of unread books or unfinished chores. part of my balance is making sure i don't consumed by the training and set boundaries. but that month after...ugly stuff trying to fill the space. it's these times i miss having an ocean nearby the most. nothing cleanses the soul like a little salt water. when a surfer is in chaos, the ocean always calls.

i figured it out, though. i got to where my feet were comfortable in shoes enough to get back offroad on two wheels. the *heavily* blistered achilles still wasn't cool with extended walking, so hiking wasn't in the cards. most of all, i started dreaming about the next one...totally unsolicited. that's when i knew it was time. the body and the mind were ready, and so we are off...243 days


Running With The Devil said...

I admire your style of writing and what you choose to write about. I just got back from a 30 day backpacking trip and know the empty feeling that hits and lingers once the mission is complete. This quote says it all:

"Each goal achieved is equally a dream destroyed." Reinhold Messner 

Scott said...

thanks. you and and old reinhold get it. brotherhood.